Mediating the Mormon / Gay Prop 8 Battle
By Scott J Harlow | December 1, 2008
I was reading up on the controversies regarding the mormon population and their influence on the passing of California’s Proposition 8, which effectively bans gay marriage in the state. Luckily, I happen to know a mormon who lives in California, so I asked the difficult questions to get to the bottom of the situation. As you can see below, I think I’ve really gotten to the heart of the issue.
Scott: I was just reading how all the gays in California hate the mormons now. Good going. You couldn’t pick on someone who deserves it (i.e. The Mexicans)?
Rachael: Hahah, it’s true. There were protestors outside of church yesterday. None of them were cute though, which was a disappointment.
Scott: I’m concerned for your safety. Thank goodness there are no gay people in San Francisco.
Topics: I Digress | No Comments »
Show Recap and Thanks
By Scott J Harlow | November 29, 2008
Just wanted to give a quick thanks to everyone who came to see me do my Standup at Caroline’s last week. It turned out to be a pretty good show, I had a great time, and most importantly everyone who came seemed to enjoy themselves.
I don’t do shows like this very often because I’m still building material and getting confident with it, but since people ask me about my comedy life I thought I’d give you some insight on my comedy “career.”
This show was great for me for two reasons. First, I did well. Saying that makes me sound like an ass, but I have the audio, people laughed, a lot. I did well, and I’m relieved. I belive in most of my material, I’ve worked hard on it, but you still want that validation I guess.
Second, I learned a lot in my short seven minutes up there. That was the first time where I really felt like I had total control over the audience. The timing was there, the rhythm was there, I was in a zone. I was relieved. Mostly because I now know that those instincts are there. I wasn’t always sure of that, but knowing I can call on them when I’m in front of a real audience is reassuring.
What is timing you ask? Well, I distinctively remember stepping on the laughter of one joke. I’m sure no one in the audience who wasn’t a comedian noticed it, but I remember it vividly. It was a joke I wasn’t expecting a big laugh on and it threw me. It was about Maddox Jolie-Pitt making a shoe. So I started my next line too early. It wasn’t a big deal, and I recovered fine, but I remember it and I’ve learned from it. It’s one of those things you learn by doing, so I’m glad I made that mistake.
Okay, now that I’m done congratulating myself let me explain something. Comparing a show like this to doing the regular open mikes I do each week is like night and day. Open mikes usually have no real audience, it’s basically just a bunch of comedians telling jokes to each other while simulatenously wondering what the hell they’re doing with their lives. But for better or worse, I’ve been able to use them to get a decent read on material. I’ve learned that bad jokes get silence, mediocre jokes get little to no reaction while good jokes get a laugh or two.
Then you do a bringer show like my night at Caroline’s and it’s completely opposite. Because the audience is supportive, they’re having a good time, and so mediocre jokes get good laughs, and solid jokes get a great reaction. It’s almost deceiving because not all audiences will be that supportive. In reality they’re probably somewhere in between the bringer and the open mics.
So that’s where I’m at. I’m sure no one cares about my analytical breakdown of my night, but that’s what I do and I needed to document it before I forgot. In the meantime, I’m going to continue working, continue doing shows, and I’ll definitely keep everyone updated.
Thanks again!
Topics: Standup | No Comments »
Caroline’s 11/18
By Scott J Harlow | November 9, 2008
Two quick things.
First, I am alive. I haven’t posted in a while and I just wanted you to know that I will not be turning into an episode of “Without A Trace.” The reason I haven’t been writing on here very much is because…
I’m performing again at Caroline’s next Tuesday the 18th at 7pm. Feel free to stop by, should be a great show. I’ve been doing a lot of writing lately and I think this show will be even better than the last one I did there. And everytime you miss one of my shows, Sarah Palin kills a moose from a helicopter. Okay that joke’s been done to death. I’m tired, cut me some slack 
Topics: Announcements, Standup | No Comments »
Popeye’s Scare
By Scott J Harlow | October 7, 2008
I’ve come to accept that I could never live in one of those really nice, upscale neighborhoods. If only because there wouldn’t be a Popeye’s Chicken & Biscuits there. To be fair, I also refuse to live within a close proximity to a Kennedy’s Fried Chicken. The police department says they can gauge how bad a neighborhood is by the percentage of business there that use bullet-proof glass. For the rest of us who don’t have those statistics, just look for a Kennedy’s Fried Chicken.
Anyway, I got a scare the other week because there was a fairly large fire right next to the Popeye’s on Steinway Street. I was incredibly worried. What would I do if there wasn’t a Popeye’s anymore? Luckily the fire was contained to the two buildings next door. The Popeye’s was saved and all that was lost was a bunch of innocent people’s homes and belongings. Thank god!!
There’s something about the dining room of Popeye’s that so primal. Grown adults tearing into chicken bones with their fingers. It’s like they found a way to set the human race back about 900 years. I can almost see myself in the Middle Ages, sitting around a fire, eating extra crispy thighs. Of course then an asian lady comes trying to sell bootleg DVD’s out of an old, plastic Express bag that really ruins the whole experience for me.
Topics: I Digress | 1 Comment »
Vice Presidential Debate - My Live Blog Recap
By Scott J Harlow | October 2, 2008
I don’t really follow politics, so I decided to live blog the debate tonight. I think it will force me to watch, and since I’m one of those awful Americans who doesn’t know what’s going on in the world, maybe we all can learn something from my observations.
10:11: Palin: ‘Say it ain’t so Joe’ - FINALLY she called him Joe.
9:00: First order of business, which channel to watch the debate on? I tried to My Network TV 9 first because I feel bad for that network in general. But it’s just a stream of Fox News. CW is showing Supernatural. Nice. I do not like Charles Gibson so ABC is out. Telemundo is in Spanish, yikes. So NBC it is.
9:03: “Can I call you Joe?” - really??
9:04: Someone was playing tic-tac-toe underneath Joe Biden’s eyes.
9:07: No one answered the moderator’s question about the economy. Are they not supposed to directly answer the question? It wasn’t hard. Obviously it’s not a good time for the nation’s economy. Duh.
9:10: Who’s Joe Six-Pack? Is that a senator?
9:11: NBC Spin-Off show idea: ‘To Catch a Predator Lender’
9:12: Is Joe Biden’s ‘Joey at the gas station’ the same guy as Palin’s ‘Joe Six-Pack?’ I’m confused.
9:15: They are having two separate conversations. It’s like every date I’ve ever been on.
9:16: Thanks Joe Biden, I would like a tax break. I didn’t pay anything under Ronald Reagan, I was six years old. So no taxes for me? I’m sold!
9:18: I have no idea what Sarah Palin is talking about. Healthcare credits? Give me Chipotle credits! I’m addicted.
9:22: Joe Biden sounds like he knows what he’s talking about with these tax breaks.
9:23: Sarah Palin took on the oil companies in Alaska!
9:25: No Joe Biden. No more tax break talk. Please.
9:27: Palin: It’s a ‘toxic mess’ on wall street. But so is the moderator’s shiny teal jacket. I mean let’s be real. That jacket is glowing like a North Korea reactor.
9:30: No Sarah Palin. No more Alaska energy talk. Please.
9:36: Biden loves the gays.
9:38: Palin tolerates them, but she may have thrown up in her mouth a little bit thinking about gay marriage.
9:39: Hmmm, now Biden doesn’t love the gays as much. That was weird.
9:40: The moderator asked if Palin agrees with Biden on gay marriage and she just gave a crazy, psychotic answer along the lines of: You asked Biden if he supports gay marriage and he said not really which I don’t not agree with.
9:41: 41 minutes in, and Palin has yet to call him Joe. Not even Joe Six-Pack.
9:44: So both VP’s love the troops but Obama and McCain do not. Palin loves The Surge. Sounds like a soft drink.
9:49: These two should just play a round of RISK and be done with all this diplomacy talk.
9:51: Why does John McCain hate Spain?? I’m confused.
9:53: Joe Biden loves Israel.
9:55: “Change is comin’” … A change to the channel.
9:57: I’m out of Wheat Thins. They make these Cinnamon Wheat Thins now and they are delicious. Cinnamon + Wheat Thins = Genius.
10:01: Joe Biden: “The American Public has the stomach for success” I say, they should have the stomach for Cinnamon Wheat Thins. They’re awesome!
10:04: I think a lot of people were expecting Sarah Palin to be a bit of a trainwreck tonight, but I think she’s held up well. Don’t get me wrong there were a few rough patches and Biden was stronger in the debate, but the only trainwreck on NBC this week is “Heroes.”
10:06: Joe Biden just plugged his website, joebiden.com It’s a dead link. Haha. Nice.
10:10: Sorry Sarah, we don’t need to know what’s going on Wasilla Main Street. Far more entertaining is what’s happening on Main Street Binghamton, NY - a crack addict passed out on a carousel horse. Not kidding.
10:12: No child left behind? No Wheat Thin left behind in my box. Fix that Sarah Palin!
10:18: She’s said ‘Energy Producing State’ like 50 times now.
10:22: Palin just described the republicans as “diverse.” HILARIOUS.
10:25: This thing is on for two hours? I was really hoping for a 30-Rock rerun for the last half hour. Bummer.
10:28: Blah Blah Blah. The average person doesn’t care about this. Tell us what you thought of ‘Dirty Sexy Money’ last night.
10:29: Is it just me or does Gwen the moderator remind you a bit of the lady from ‘Carmen Sandiego?’
10:30: Stop saying you’re an average american family Palin. You’re in Alaska for god sakes!
10:32: Sorry Biden, but we’re never going to have the best healthcare possible. That’s called Sweden. Look into it.
10:33: It’s over.
10:34: It’s like the end of The Price is Right where the family comes on stage afterwards. Cute.
10:37: Tom Brokaw should really use my blog as a reference. He’s stumbling.
Topics: Television | 13 Comments »
Put Back The O.J.
By Scott J Harlow | September 26, 2008
I was thinking about the O.J. Simpson robbery trial today and how nobody seems to care. Well I care! After a hard look at the facts of the case I’ve come to the conclusion that we should let him go. Sure he may have killed two people a decade ago. But he made three Naked Gun movies. So really, don’t we kinda owe him one? Sure the third Naked Gun movie wasn’t as good as the others, but this is an armed robbery charge, not another murder. Less funny movie balances with lesser felony. Let’s give the poor guy a break.
Topics: I Digress | No Comments »
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